Have you noticed an increasing number of broadcast and print stories dealing with the deep consciousness of animals and plants; minerals and trees?
Somehow, what were unthinkable topics a few years ago (Animal Communication; The Secret Lives of Trees; How Animals Mirror Our Deepest Feelings and Consciousness; The Stones That Talk and Guide Us, etc.), have become more and more frequent and acceptable.
I’m not sure if these pioneer programs represent a shift in our “collective consciousness,” or rather, it’s a coming together of right-thinking people that will tip the balance toward more and more spirituality and equality, especially relative to our environment.
I see also in the healing professions (Therapy, Coaching, Massage) less and less emphasis on “talk and logic,” and more on “Body Awareness.”
Knowing through perception and intuition.
Maybe the extraordinary books by Antonio Damasio (Descartes’ Error) and Bessel Van Der Kolk M.D (The Body Keeps The Score) helped push the idea that the body and the emotions are the repository of wisdom, and are our connection, our oneness, with all nature. Our salvation as a species.
Many of these new concepts like inter species communication and the role Spirit plays in our lives have stirred some uneasiness. Even Fear. Which prompted me to ask on Linkedin’s Coaching/Therapy forum: How many times have you asked someone who is in fear, “What do you need to ease your fear? Instead of, “Why are you so afraid!”
The question drew an astonishing 290 responses..
The responses were all over the place, but most of them followed the conventional idea that fear is a product of “negative beliefs” and stems from the mind. That fear is perfectly controllable by the mind. We just have to find ways to “root it out” or convert it to “positive” feelings.
One therapist coach, the UK-based Cath Norris, consistently provided deeper and more open-hearted responses.
To her, fear is not so much to be managed or eased or controlled, but to be dialogued with. Fear is to be seen as a great and wonderful opportunity for self-knowledge and wisdom.
With her permission, I’m presenting her comments:
“Yes Kaleel, trust and rapport, recognition and acknowledgement, and ‘I’m here, I can feel that you’re afraid’ is a starting point.
We needn’t lead people out of their fear. Who’s to say fear isn’t the single most important feeling of their life… the thing which is at the crux of their identity?
Our job, as I see it, (she said) is to hold steady, not to lead others into easing their fear – that’s simply mirroring fear, being caught in the energy of it.
As coaches, therapists, we must meet what is there with our clients. And friends and family.
How do we know that it hasn’t taken a person a lifetime to call it up and face it?
Norris goes on to tell us that she had this situation recently with someone who lived with a lifetime full of fear and anxiety.
“My client continuously tried to ‘ease’ her pain, run from it, erase it with years of meds.
I was intrigued by her fear, genuinely interested in what it had to say.
Yes there were old terrors triggered each time she felt no control.
More importantly there was a disconnection from her essential self, an earlier life saving decision to serve others, which was striking terror into her heart because she was empty, never having been there for herself, living with unmet needs and dreams.
That’s what her fear told her, her beautiful, life-giving fear that was trying to wake her so that she could live.”
I asked Cath how she worked with her client to help her awaken.
“What helped her face her fear and come deeply into it and herself, wasn’t my need to ease her fear, rather it was my faith in this strong, intelligent woman and in her deep awareness.
More, perhaps, it was hope and light-heartedness and a spirit of inquiry, a foot in the fear and a foot outside, firmly planted, and her being willing to face something which just wouldn’t go away until it had been heard and acknowledged.
That process took seven hours… after 25 years of attempted ‘easing’….”
Cath closed her comments with this quote from Gabriele Roth:
“Your body is the ground and metaphor of your life, the expression of your existence. It is your Bible, your encyclopedia, your life story. Everything that happens to you is stored and reflected in your body. In the marriage of flesh and spirit divorce is impossible.”
My Animal Communicator mentor, Nancy Windheart, added: “Where I see people go off in their work as animal communicator’s is moving into, trying to fix or heal or recommend…and confusing that with communication.”
In truth, when we are seeking union with, trying to be of help to someone who is in fear mode, giving advice is the worst thing we can possibly do. Or maybe trying to “fix” the fear is the worst thing. Just show up; be there with an open heart trusting the person’s process. Supporting them. Asking what they need.
And get out of the way!
For other ways to practice awareness, you may also be interested in reading the following posts: